Never let it be said that ground crews lack a sense of humor. Here are some actual maintenance complaints submitted by UPS pilots (marked with a P) an... the solutions recorded (marked with an S) by maintenance engineers.By the way, UPS is the only major airline that has never, ever, had an accident.P: Left inside main tire almost needs replacement.S: Almost replaced left inside main tire.*P: Test flight OK, except auto-land very rough.S: Auto-land not installed on this aircraft.*P: Something. Anita laughed. She was wearing a short summer dress and I knew she was not wearing panties; something she did when she was feeling naughty. Mike pressed his crotch against her round buttocks…She tried to escape, but he held her tight.My wife could for sure feel his cock getting bigger as he pressed it against her. I guessed she tried to resist; but she was curious…Protesting again, Ana put her hands on the counter to try to push away. When she did, instead of escaping she merely pressed her. He and the innkeeper’s wife had been preparing to flee when forestalled by my arrival. I advised them to lock themselves in the cellar, and (having prepared myself with the necessary equipment) ascended the staircase. Entering the room described to me by the lad, I immediately espied the desiccated corpse of the unfortunate innkeeper. On the bed lay not one but two vile and unclothed harpies, besmeared with fresh gore. I deduced that one of them must be the kitchen-maid, who had been infected. I was really hot and horny by this stage, so I put on some loud music and did what I considered a slow sensual strip tease for him, and it certainly had the desired effect because by the time the last piece of clothing had fluttered to the floor and I was standing before him completely naked, his jeans and pants were around his ankles and his cock was jutting ramrod straight up into the air, with him stroking it slowly.I have to admit I felt a momentary disappointment that he hadn't undressed.
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