I cried the whole drive home. Looking back, I'm surprised that I couldeven see where I was going, I had cried so much.At home, I opened a bottle of w...ne, and just sat on the couch in the darkthinking about what I had done. I was so ashamed. I wanted to callMatt, his voice would make me feel better, but I was too ashamed.I woke up with everything still being dark, with nasty headache, andhaving to go to the bathroom. While doing my thing, a wave of nauseawashed over me, and I threw up.. It was not quite the superbly staffed research hospital. Lying in bed, I shifted, and felt some of my cardiac monitoring leads fall off. This should have shown as asystole -- heart not beating -- on the display in the nursing station. I also had a hose disconnect from my continuous positive airway pressure (CPAP) breathing machine, so I really needed a nurse.Two hours later, no one had responded to my call button. Posted everywhere is the extension to call to invoke the “code blue” team for. None of them would be needed. ‘Helene, how do you feel?’ ‘Very relaxed, wonderful.’ ‘Elise, how do you feel?’ ‘Wonderful.’ ‘When I say wake, you will wake, when I say sleep, you will go into an even deeper trance.’ ‘Wake.’ They both opened their eyes and sat up. ‘Helene, what do you think of what’s going on, so far.’ ‘Not much, I haven’t seen anything yet. When are you going to do your hypnosis?’ ‘How about you, Elise?’ ‘I feel good, but I can’t tell you what happened. Will I be a good. He poured himself a small whisky and sat sipping and watching her breathing. When it was clear that she was sound asleep he unpacked the other thing he’d bought in his morning shop, an inflatable mattress, intended for the beach, but good enough for at least one night’s sleep.He wrapped himself in the duvet that Candice wasn’t using and allowed himself to sleep. Twice during the night he was woken by the alarms on his watch, set so that he could check how she was doing. All seemed well, but he.
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